Passion for the Trail

When I took my first walk to try to convince myself that the dream that has come to me about walking across the country, I walked seventeen miles without training. I had the wrong shoes.  I had the wrong socks. I didn't drink enough water. I didn't eat enough calories.  I had a blister at six miles. I kept going, and that was probably pretty foolish.  This was the result. I was down for two weeks.  I ended the walk with pictures of hamburger feet.  The idea of the walk persisted, and thankfully so did I.

Over the last two years, my life has been transformed by the trail. I see the world differently. My mind is less cluttered. I look to the sky, and I'm shown the glory of the universe on a daily basis.

Airborne - Charlotte, NC to Pensacola, FL

The first six miles of that first practice walk was filled with both boredom and anxiety. My mind was chattering to itself. I had not moved that slowly without entertainment for a very long time. The trees looked the same. The sky looked the same. The trail looked the same. It's because I had forgotten how to see. I'd become undisciplined in my thinking. I'd become addicted to the easy cotton candy entertainment of the television. I could no longer see what was right in front of my face.

 

Airborne #2 - Charlotte, NC to Pensacola, FL

I no longer bury my head in a book or a screen trying to hide from the people and the experiences around me. I can look out the airline window for an hour waiting because I know that the great moment is coming. The clouds will clear dn the blue sky will manifest. The river will shine in the sun, and if I'm not paying attention.  If my brain demands constant entertainment, I'll miss it, and the moment will be lost forever. I learned this patience on the trail trying to drive an crazy escape fantasy out of my head.

Fellow Travellers - Fairhope, AL

It took some time, but I learned to chase the sun. I learned to put myself outside during the golden hour and then wait. I learned to see again, and I'm hooked. Walking is not boring. It's one of the most passion filled aspects of my life.

Laid Back - Feet Up - Fairhope, AL

I had a couple of more miles to walk after this photo was taken, but one foot in front of another had taken me to this time and place, and it was worth a moment to soak it all in. I have no idea what the bottom of my feet look like today, but I guarantee they don't look like they did at the end of that first practice walk.

I continue to be amazed at what the universe brings across my path, and everyday my love...my passion...my calling for the walk grows a little stronger. My life is getting fuller, and I hope that one day this journey might help someone else. I have peace and contentment in abundance, and if you want some of mine you're welcome to it. I'd love to have you join me in this journey, and I'm looking forward to what tomorrow will reveal.

Leaning Into the Dream

A series of events happened this week that have pushed me deeper into pursuing the dream of walking from Newport, RI to Newport, OR.  It's been awhile since I told the tale of the beginning of this journey, but it's worth recapping a short version of the story here.

About four years ago (almost to the day really), I had managed to earn my way into a very dark place in my life. I couldn't stand staying where I was, and I really couldn't imagine moving forward. All I really wanted to do was escape, and the notion crossed my mind to drop my job, my possessions, and all other attachments and strike out on the road headed west.  I was in terrible physical shape, and I had no real plan other than to escape the pain that I'd created for myself. It was a silly escape fantasy, and fortunately for me I went in another direction.

The narrative of that branch of the trail is a completely different story, so I'll let it sit for now, but about a year later, I found myself in a much better place.  I'd begun the process of shedding my demons, and my physical fitness was on the mend. My thinking had changed from a feeling of crushing entrapment to optimism.  My work, relationships, finances...almost everything that defines the standard notion of the "American Dream" had improved.  One thing that I kept from that dark morass of hopelessness was the notion of the walk.

I have no inkling why this idea proved to be so sticky. There was nothing really to escape from at this point, but there the idea sat...percolating. I decided something had to be done.  The idea was crazy. It was irresponsible. There was just no way to "earn a living" (more on this notion of earning a living in a later post) walking across America. Something had to be done to rid myself of this idea, so one day I mentioned it to Rory Conlan (you know him, the guy who is overdue on his once every six month post promising more posts).

Rory is a responsible sort. I've even accused him of having an overdeveloped sense of responsibility from time to time. He's steady, practical, and traditional. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he would hate the idea of walking across America. He'd tell me it was irresponsible. Crazy. Not the right thing to be thinking about doing much less seriously planning on doing it. I'd verbalize the sticky idea, and he'd give me all the logical reasons it should be discounted immediately. I was not wrong.

Rory performed admirably. He laid out his case. He reacted with great skepticism. He went through a long list of reasons that it couldn't and shouldn't be done. He appealed to the irresponsibility of it all. He poured cold water all over my silly notion. The flames had gone out, and I left that conversation with only a little ember of thought that I was sure would fade with time.  My plan to get rid of the idea had worked.

Two weeks later, I was on a call with Rory, and he brought up the walk. He asked me where I had thought it might happen. I'd done some initial research, so I said the thought before he killed it had been to walk from Newport, RI to Newport, OR largely along US Highway 20. I hadn't named the walk yet, but that was about as far as I'd gotten.

I began to get a little anxious. Rory was making positive sounds. Then he did what I thought was about a 50/50 chance when I first told him about the walk. He said it sounded like a fine adventure. The embers of the idea burst back into a little flame.

Over the coming months he and I talked about the idea more and more. We both did more research. We talked about ideas for funding it. I wondered what it would feel like to walk 3300 miles, and I wondered how long it would take. I eventually settled on a 30 mile per day target, and we continued to talk. Eventually the talk led to action, and we both began to train.

We've had setbacks since then, and we're still not out on the road. Lot's of things have happened in my life, but the dream of the walk continues to be pushed to fruition through work and the gentle hand circumstances beyond my control. Just this week, I was given the gift of more discretionary time to work toward the dream that is slowly becoming the Newport to Newport Transcontinental Pilgrimage (N2N-TCP).

College Creek Sunset (from a few days ago) - Annapolis, MD

I continue to encounter enriching experiences along this journey. I've gotten outside. I stopped watching television. Many of my worries, things that I once thought were important enough to drive my anxiety level higher than warranted, have vanished.  Today, I've walked eight miles, and I'll probably get in a few more.

I don't know what will happen tomorrow, but four years later, we're closer to the dream of the N2N-TCP than ever before.  I'm enjoying the trail, and I'll keep pushing forward.